Archive for May, 2014

Season 1, Episode 11, “Standardized Test”

Season 1, Episode 11, “Standardized Test”

Guys and girls I don’t know what happened. The DVD’s I’m using had this episode as the next one, when it’s supposed to be “Superdad.” I found out when I went to check the name of this episode, “Standardized Test”, and turns out this is episode 11. So enjoy episode 11. I’ll get it all squared out by next week. I swear I should’ve done “The Wonder Years.” All those episodes are on Netflix and in order. Sorry about all this.

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Saved by the Bell Season 2, Episode 4: “Driver’s Education”

Saved by the Bell Season 2, Episode 4: “Driver’s Education”

vlcsnap-2014-05-13-16h36m22s237 We open with Zack Morris randomly sliding down the handrail. He tells us that Driver’s Ed starts today and he will soon be permitted by the state of California to operate a dangerous vehicle on public roadways, which makes me reconsider every visiting California again. vlcsnap-2014-05-13-16h36m46s0Kelly comes up and, since they’re now dating since the prom episode, Zack Morris decides that he needs something to put on Kelly to signify that she’s his property now. Since branding her is impractical, he decided to get her a ring, which he declares is only a “friendship ring.” And Kelly totally buys it because any rational questioning on her part would delay the story.
vlcsnap-2014-05-13-16h37m20s66Kelly repays Zack Morris’s thoughtful act of male aggression with a peck on the lips, which the audience naturally goes fucking crazy over.because no one in their audience has ever felt the touch of another. Oh and Zack Morris also flirts with Mr. Belding, who exhibits the reaction one would expect when being propositioned by Zack Morris.vlcsnap-2014-05-13-16h37m43s7It’s time for Driver’s Ed class in the next scene so, naturally, Screech wears a motorcycle helmet.vlcsnap-2014-05-13-16h38m05s253 Zack Morris makes sure to point out to Slater that Kelly is wearing his ring now, meaning she’s his property and Slater can’t touch her. And Slater looks dejected that he lost. read more

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Roman Holiday. Episode 1×11.

Roman Holiday. Episode 1×11.

Are we going to Rome? Could that be what the episode name refers to? That’d be a great episode. Instead, it’s probably a lame Christmas episode. At least we have an Audrey Hepburn reference for Miss Blair.

Where is Chuck Bass? My guess, a brothel. I hope it’s not the one Serena called boarding school.

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It’s a bizarre bazaar at the private schools on the Upper East Side just in time for Christmas! Here’s a good question. This is the 11th episode about a group of high schoolers on the Upper East Side. I think we have seen them maybe twice at school in these 11 episodes. The College Week episode, Episode 3 was the one episode that took place at school. The show was constantly criticized for all the underage drinking. However, no one ever thought to criticize them for the truancy. Granted, the show would be pretty damn boring if it showed them in class, but at least we saw Harbour from time to time on The O.C. read more

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The New Class Season 1, Episode 7: “Homecoming King”

The New Class Season 1, Episode 7: “Homecoming King”

We open at a school assembly  being held in the gym, and all the students are sitting in metal folding chairs. Boy, the producers were really going all out for sets on this show. I thought the sets on the original series were bad but this is just pathetic.vlcsnap-2014-05-10-12h53m57s181 And what’s this important assembly announcing? Why, the candidates for homecoming king and queen of course! After all, that’s such a prestigious honor it requires an assembly of the entire school, or at least of all the regulars and as many extras as they could gather together. Mr. Belding asks Weasel for the suitcase with the nominations in it. I have no idea why Weasel has this or what it’s doing in a suitcase but I’m learning not to question things on this show. It only gives me a headache. read more

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Saved by the Bell Season 2, Episode 3: “Save the Max”

Saved by the Bell Season 2, Episode 3: “Save the Max”

vlcsnap-2014-05-06-17h41m22s177 We open with Zack Morris and Screech wandering into an obviously off limits part of the school that they’ve never seen before. Why, it’s the school radio station, which happens to be KKTY, Wyoming’s Hottest Country, coming straight from Glendo, Wyoming. I’m assuming that this is the result of the same warping of the laws of time and space that caused three kids and their principal to suddenly find themselves in California after growing up in Indiana.

Anyway, they pull off some sheets and it appears that, conveniently, whenever the radio station was closed, nothing was put away or taken down, not even the last record that was playing. And there’s not a speck of dust to be found. They decide to plug it in and see if it still works and it appears that the record player is even still turned on and the station id playing. How convenient!vlcsnap-2014-05-06-17h42m16s208Oh and I’d be remiss if I didn’t at least mention Screech here doing his Don King impersonation, even though it has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the episode. read more

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