Archive for December, 2015

The New Class Season 4, Episode 25: “Fire at the Max, Part 1”

The New Class Season 4, Episode 25: “Fire at the Max, Part 1”

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Ah, Christmas at The Max! Unfortunately for me, Santa didn’t bring me the cancellation of this awful show. Well, there’s always next Christmas, if I’m so lucky. But it’s nice to see the writers of this show know the climate of Southern California so well they dressed our gang like they’re expecting snowfall any moment. Way to fuck up in the first few seconds there, guys.

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But the plot contrivance fairy did visit because Ryan, the guy who’s been characterized the last two seasons as being lazy and refusing to get a job is now working at The Max, and there’s absolutely no reason for it except that it’s convenient to the plot. I seriously think this is the laziest this show has ever sunk. The only way they could have done worse is have Screech spontaneously combust and cause the titular fire. Oh, wait, that would have been awesome! Best episode ever! read more

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The College Years Episode 15: “The Rave”

The College Years Episode 15: “The Rave”

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In our cold opening, Kelly decides an episode is enough to get over her passionate two episode relationship with Lasky, so she comes and asks to be back in his class so she can be a part of the wacky hijinks sure to ensue. Lasky says now that he’s had his turn at being unethical so he’s back on the straight and narrow now that the plot demands it. As such, he’s placed Kelly with another professor so he won’t be tempted to jump her again. She totally shows she’s over Lasky by running out in a hissy fit, proving how mature and shit she is. read more

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Season 4, Episode 14: “Feet of Clay”

Season 4, Episode 14: “Feet of Clay”

Feet of Clay sees the return of Jeff, from Who’s Zoomin Who? Yeah, you’d think that, since Brad Pitt’s in this episode, but he’s playing an entirely new character here. Here Pitt plays a rockstar that Ben idolizes and gets to meet in the episode. I read the plot summary before watching the episode. It seems so predictable that it hurts. I predict Ben will end up meeting Jonathan Keith and he’ll turn out to be a dick or something. That’s how a lot of these plot lines go. Will I be right? Let’s see! read more

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The New Class Season 4, Episode 24: “Stealing Screech”

The New Class Season 4, Episode 24: “Stealing Screech”

Oh! Could this be a Christmas miracle!?!?! Could someone be taking Screech away from this show? If so, I say they can keep them! Oh, hallelujah! This could be the event that’s so miraculous it makes atheists believe in a god!

No, of course that’s not what this episode is about because, as we’ve established many times, the universe hates me. A lot. As such, it likes to see me suffer around this series.

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We open in Mr. Belding’s office, where we learn that Valley beat Bayside in basketball. Well, maybe part of the problem is your spirit banner was tucked away in Mr. Belding’s office so no one knew to give a shit! This upsets Mr. Belding because Valley’s principal, Mr. Huffington, likes to gloat. I guess the producers were too cheap to bring back Mr. Stingwell from the original series even though they’ve brought back more minor characters. read more

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The College Years Episode 14: “A Question of Ethics”

The College Years Episode 14: “A Question of Ethics”

Note: The issue with commenting now seems to be fixed. Apologies to everyone who tried to comment in the last week and got an error. It seems WordPress updated to a new version and caused one of the Plugins I use to be incompatible. Thanks to Jonathon who messaged me on Facebook to alert me to the problem. If anyone has any further issues, please feel free to message me on Facebook or through the contact me page.

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In the cold opening, Zack Morris enters to the audience exploding in orgasm at his mere presence. He brags about being in a class other than Archaeology, Ethics! Fortunately, it’s in the same lecture hall as Archaeology, too, so there’s no need to build another set. He says the professor is super easy, but that would make for a boring episode so Slater comes in and announces that their professor won the lottery and ran off with the soccer coach, because it’s apparently ethical in the Saved by the Bell universe to ignore a teaching contract as long as it’s convenient. read more

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